The World Was Hers, Then She Became a Mom | NYT – Conception

The World Was Hers, Then She Became a Mom | NYT - Conception

At 17, Marie loved feeling like anything was possible. Then she watched the line on her pregnancy test turn pink.

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  1. I feel like this embodies my mother. My mom was 22, when she had me, im two years away from that age and i can’t even imagine myself as a mother. She did the best she could for me with my father before my brother was born and then my father left. I don’t feel like she was meant to be a mom, she wasn’t bad to me there was just a clear resentment sometimes. It was hard for her being single and raising two kids both of which are sick (I’ve had two have two pacemakers put in and my brother had a part of his brain cauterized and decompressed). It was made even worse by my step siblings (who I love like blood but they were BAD for a few years) and my step father who was mean and worked all the time. I don’t blame her for not wanting to be a mother sometimes, I wouldn’t want to be a mother either. Her dreams were changed and her life that she always wanted fell apart. I just wish my birth had been under different circumstances.

  2. I have that T-Shirt and totally understand. That day that you realise your dreams will probably not come true because you now have someone to take care of whose life is more important than yours – giving birth to a child you definitely did not want, but instantly love. One thing not addressed in this series is the profound sadness and envy experienced when friends are excited and thrilled about becoming pregnant – a joy never experienced. I have always envied those who were so very happy from the moment their pregnancy was confirmed Motherhood really is a wonder – but so often starts with terror and fear of the future..

    I agree with another commentator in this thread that this series is under-appreciated. I'm willing to bet there are many women who became young mothers who would understand and appreciate this series, and especially this segment.

  3. Wow, this is not how i felt about becoming a mother. I married at 32, had first baby at 33 and second one at 38. My girls are the best thing that ever happened to me and my husband feels the same way.

  4. that's my mother
    she's always talking to her boyfriend on the phone
    from the moment she wakes up
    to the moment she sleeps
    even right now
    she lives with her lover
    and not me

  5. Wow what a beautiful video and series. I'm not sure how I stumbled upon these, but they are all so moving and well told. The animations are great. I hope this gains note traction because I'd love to see more. Sure these stories don't play into the stereotypes of motherhood or bolster up the idealised image of motherhood, but that's why it's so important to tell them. Mothers are people too!!

  6. this is my favorite episode, so far. i loved the animation, style and, of course, the story. i've found with this series that motherhood is so much more complex than what anyone can imagine, and though i don't speak from experience or anything, i think that Marie being by her daughter's side, even when she didn't feel like doing so, is such a powerful and strong thing to do.

  7. Normalize and legalize abortion. Stories like this, mothers who try so hard and still resent their children, is why we need all women to have access to abortion without parents consent

  8. I just don't like the idea that she was angry at her daughter for being born when it was her stupid mistake of getting pregnant as a minor in the first place. And the reason it took that long for her not to realize all the problems came from her is that of this sick reasoning that her daughter took away her freedom. I really hate this story feel bad for the daughter

  9. It's very hard for teenagers to bond with their babies when they are still children themselves. They don't have a maternal instinct, they lack skills, and are just not developed enough. It very rarely is a good situation in the beginning although it eventually balances out for some of them.

  10. If your parents don't allow you to get an abortion then they should raise the child. Women should not be forced to be mothers or feel guilty if they choose not to.

  11. You should never feel bad that you do not want to be a mother , it’s okay. I believe it’s your choice on what you want to do , and you where forced to raise her and you did Your best , many parents would mistreat the baby or just leave the baby , and I’m so happy you didn’t leave your little girl , she needs you and you where there. ❤️

  12. The pro-life argument isn't that she should be forced to carry a child she doesn't want. Rather, she should have her baby and give him or her to someone who does through adoption.

  13. It is sad that many people still don't understand that you need to want to be a mother, it is not something natural for everyone. Not all the mothers who did not look for a baby end up loving their lives and children

  14. i feel this so much. my mother also had me at 23 and we have a distant relationship. oftentimes i wish i was aborted instead but abortion is illegal in my country. i respect that shes doing her best to provide financially as a single mother but she just doesnt know how to be emotionally nurturing to me and my siblings. i've always thought she has an underlying resentment towards me because she had me young and she wasnt able to do everything she wanted and she prioritizes herself and her relationships more than her children and that definitely affected our relationship negatively. we never bonded. im 23 now and i dont want to be a mother. i wish everyone understood that not every woman is suitable for motherhood

  15. Don’t have kids unless your sure you can properly care for them. My mom’s not cut out to be a mother, and I can constantly feel her anger. I feel like a burden. Sometimes I wish I was never born. Don’t subject a child to something like this, it’s not fair.

  16. Thank you for this because the firsr time ever I saw the possibility that maby my mom felt this and even though she wanted me and was the happiest,I still feel that maby she felt this but couldnt see how its those things,not depression and stuff. Maby subconciously she thought she lost her freedom idk?

  17. I feel bad for the child, to be basically told by the comment section it was better if they were aborted, they could believe it themselves. It becomes more difficult to learn self-love, when people believe your mother should have aborted you, simply because the mother deserved better, and you're better off too, non existent.
    The child being the object of debate, is alive. It's just heartbreaking. I dont care whther you're pro-whatever. Maybe the child has the same views with you whatever that is, but what does that feel like?

  18. You should not have to have your parents’ permission to get an abortion. If your parents say no, you’re then forced into having a baby. Like wtf it’s not their decision

  19. "My mom made it clear that I was a mistake. My mom made it clear that I ruined her life." No, it was totally your mom fault, she or the world is to blame, but not you. Live your life confidently, be happy, marry or not, have children or not, just don't live felling guilt or under other's expectations. It's not your fault to born.

  20. I want to be a mother too. But with so many variables about my settlement and security, I cannot imagine having a child. It is a calculated decision that I will not regret for a foreseeable future.

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